Under the bed

A homily for the 32nd Sunday in Ordinary Time, November 6, 2022

2 Mc 7:1-2, 9-14, 2 Thes 2:16-3:5, Lk 20:27-38

I am a tech nerd, a gadget head, enthralled with gizmos, a personality quirk that goes back to before my high school days when I was an AV geek playing with 1-inch videotape and gritty black-and-white images from a somewhat massive camera.

So it’s probably no surprise that I usually say goodnight to Alexa — not because it’s a real person but because I have it programmed to rattle off my calendar and the weather for the next day. And then I do something silly: I tell Samuel L. Jackson to sleep tight. His voice randomly replies, occasionally with wishes for sweet dreams but a warning nonetheless to check under the bed.

Because monsters, right?

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Attracted

A homily for the 31st Sunday in Ordinary Time, October 30, 2022

Wis 11:22-12:2, 2 Thes 1:11-2:2, Lk 19:1-10

Back in the 1960s and early ’70s, Mel Brooks and Carl Reiner did a couple of albums featuring a character they called The 2,000-Year-Old Man, played by Brooks. They did comedic interviews and let the supposedly really old man reminisce about the good old, old, old days.

One bit they did was about religion, about whether they believed in a god before Abraham introduced them to I Am.

Yes, Brooks said, a guy named Phil.

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Up, not out

A homily for the 30th Sunday in Ordinary Time

Sir 35:12-14, 16-18, 2 Tm 4:6-8, 16-18, Lk 18:9-14

When we hear about a natural disaster or a manmade tragedy (and, yes, dammit, they’re made mostly by men), how do we react? How do we act?

Probably the first thing we do is consider how much loose change we have, or whether we’re willing to skip a pumpkin spice latte this week, so we can send a few bucks to whatever charitable organization is taking the lead on relief efforts.

And with the ability to donate online, we can make a tiny bit of difference without getting off the couch. Website or app, click here, card information already stored, type in the CVV afresh, submit. 

And for less than a dollar a day…

Yeah, we all know those commercials, don’t we?

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It keeps you running

A homily for the 29th Sunday in Ordinary Time, October 16, 2022

Ex 17:8-13, 2 Tm 3:14-4:2, Lk 18:1-8

In the 2007 movie “Run Fatboy Run,” a ne’er-do-well man who’s made an infamous name for himself by running away from commitments accepts a challenge — a macho dare, really — to run in a marathon.

The character played by British comic actor Simon Pegg is an out-of-shape cigarette smoker whose feeble attempts at training leave him totally unprepared to finish the race, let alone compete in the first place. 

But there he is at the starting gate, arriving in barely the nick of time, running because of jealousy and insecurity. 

Not exactly the best motivation to stride 26.2 miles.

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You’ll know them

Some brief thoughts in lieu of a homily* for the 26th Sunday in Ordinary Time, September 25, 2022

Am 6:1a, 4-7, 1 Tm 6:11-16, Lk 16:19-31

Everything we have is a gift, even if we are convinced otherwise, even if we are convinced that we did it all ourselves.

Even if we supposedly earned or won everything we have on this Earth, we earned it or won it with innate skills or talents or intellect or sheer dumb luck that themselves were gifts.

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Trustworthy, loyal, helpful…

A homily for the 25th Sunday in Ordinary Time, September 18, 2022

Am 8:4-7, 1 Tm 2:1-8, Lk 16:10-13

Trust.

It’s at the heart of every relationship: personal, business or governmental. It underpins every transaction.

It’s the first byword of the Boy Scout Law: A Scout is trustworthy.

A trust — a structure that manages finances for someone or some group — ensures stability and security in perpetuity.

And speaking of finances, even our money says simply, “In God We Trust.”

Trust is an absolute.

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Return trip

A homily for the 24th Sunday in Ordinary Time, September 11, 2022

Ex 32:7-11, 13-14, 1 Tm 1:12-17, Lk 15:1-32

A news article about the cleanup of a toxic-waste dump quoted an environmental scientist about the contaminated soil. 

It’s like a kitchen sponge, he said. You can rinse a sponge and squeeze it again and again, but you never get all the soap or dirt out of it, no matter how many times you try, no matter how hard you try.

You can get really close, but that’s it.

Which is exactly what happens when we seek forgiveness.

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Yard sale

A homily for the 23rd Sunday in Ordinary Time, September 4, 2022

Wis 9:13-18b, Phmn 9-10, 12-17, Lk 14:25-33

The late great George Carlin had a bit in which he lampooned Americans’ obsessive materialism. Everything, he would say, was about stuff.

We go to work to make money to buy stuff. We buy houses to keep our stuff in. When we’ve bought more stuff than our houses can hold, we buy bigger houses.

And then someone invented storage units.

Meanwhile, the bumper sticker reminds us: Live Simply So That Others May Simply Live.

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Aw, shucks

A homily for the 22nd Sunday in Ordinary Time, August 28, 2022

Sir 3:17-18, 20, 28-29, Heb 12:18-19, 22-24a, Lk 14:1, 7-14

Imagine for a second that you’re a top-flight horseback rider and you’ve just won a coveted blue ribbon.

Or maybe you’re a quilter, and you’ve won a blue ribbon.

Or a chef, and you’ve achieved Cordon Bleu.

The applause is deafening. Your family and friends and total strangers are cheering for you, clapping for you, patting you on the back, maybe asking for your autograph.

Then it’s time to say a few words.

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